Vagablond

Norsk eller?365

Posted by vagablond 2013-01-24 09:07:47

Jeg undres hvordan de som vandrer inn til Norge med mål for øye om en ny start i en ny tilværelse opplever Norge og nordmenn.

Det kan neimen ikke være lett å komme til et land der folk tenker at de er det beste folket på kloden, det folk som tar de beste avgjørelser og generelt er best i alt. Med unntak av nordmenn som selv har vært nye i andre land, vil jeg påstå at det norske folk er det folk som er minst imøtekommende, minst empatiske og verst på inkludering; ikke seg i mellom, men sånn imellom nordmenn og de som er nest best eller ikke like best.

Jeg har mange eksempler, men velger å falle tilbake på den opplevelsen som er ferskest; det store bankbyttet.

Jeg er norsk.

Jeg er født i Norge, har vokst opp her og gått all skolegang fra første klasse og ut videregående i Norge. Jeg har norsk vennekrets, har norske hobbier og norsk humor. Jeg synes også jeg er best i mange ting og er stolt av å være norsk når jeg er i utlandet. Jeg kjenner ikke naboene mine, spiser taco på fredager og er støttemedlem på et treningssenter. Fastlege har jeg også. Tvers igjennom norsk med andre ord. Men, jeg har statsborgerskap i et annet land. Jeg valgt å beholde dette borgerskapet da jeg fylte 18, i og med jeg føler dette statsborgerskapet er del av min kulturelle arv og identitet.

Det var hverken noen fordeler eller ulemper ved å ha et pass med en annen nasjonalitet påskrevet, da det allikevel står at Norge er føde- og bostedsland. Landet der jeg har tilhørighet.

For en tid tilbake tok jeg opp lån til bil. Av praktiske årsaker ønsket jeg å samle lån, bruks- og sparekontoer i en og samme bank. Jeg sa opp kontrakten med Nordea og opprettet konto hos DNB over telefon. Det var hyggelig kundeservice og rådgiveren på telefon opplyste om mange muligheter og tilbud.

I og med jeg ønsket bankkort til de nye kontoene, avtalte jeg et møte i den lokale banken. Jeg hadde tatt med pass i og med det fra mars 2007 ble innført endrede krav for legitimering i norske banker.

Rådgiveren i den lokale banken ba om legitimasjon og poengterte at ”i og med du ikke er norsk, må vi ha dokumentasjon på identitet utover visa-kort og førerkort.” Jeg trodde dette gjaldt alle og enhver, men skitt au. Jeg la frem passet mitt, hvorpå hele bankballetten begynte.

I og med jeg ikke var norsk, hadde banken behov for skattekort og mine siste 3 lønnsslipper. Innsyn i tidligere banks kontooppgaver var ikke tilstrekkelig. Jeg måtte også forklare hva min intensjon med opphold i Norge var og om jeg tenkte å være her permanent.

Jeg forklarte at jeg var født og oppvokst her, at jeg jobbet her og ikke har tenkt å vandre ut. Jeg måtte allikevel vise til at jeg hadde alle tillatelser i orden.

Heldigvis kunne jeg bla opp i passet mitt på den siden der jeg har et klistremerke som sier ”Arbeids-og Oppholdstillatelse”. Dette klistremerke mente Politiet i sin tid var unødvendig for meg å ha, da jeg uansett hadde norsk fødsels-og personnummer og med dette alle rettigheter og plikter som enhver nordmann har.

Politiet utstedte omsider klistremerket allikevel, da jeg forklarte at dette var kjekt å ha i passkontroller i utlandet. Hadde jeg ikke hatt dette fra før, måtte jeg dratt fra banken til politiet og ordnet dette.

Jeg fikk ikke utrettet det jeg ville i banken den dagen, og tilbake på kontoret, sendte jeg skattekort og lønnsslipper til rådgiver.

Dette viste seg å ikke være tilstrekkelig, og jeg trengte da også å oversende en kopi av arbeidskontrakten min. Rådgiver trengte bekreftelse på at jeg hadde tenkt å oppholde meg i Norge over lengre tid.

Etter et par uker mottok jeg mitt nye bankkort. Uten ID. Jeg mottok også ny bank-ID, men dette fungerte ikke. Om det var på grunn av den nyetablerte identitetskrisen min overfor banken eller generell uflaks kan jeg bare spekulere i. Jeg velger å tro det første.

...

Jeg er heldig som fortsatt blir spurt om ”leg” i døren på utesteder og ønsket dermed ID bakpå bankkortet. Det er også kjekt på reiser, da man slipper å ha med seg pass for å få betale med kort.

Jeg ringte banken og fikk snakke med rådgiver. At jeg hadde fått kort uten ID? Jo, det var fordi de ikke hadde bilde av meg. Jeg dro innom banken samme dag og smilte pent til fotografen.

Og jeg ventet, 1 uke, 2 uker, 3 uker. Jeg ringte og fikk beskjed om at det var mye pågang og lang saksbehandlingstid. Jeg ventet 1 uke til, 2 uker til.. Det kom aldri noe bankkort med ID.

Jeg ringte igjen. Samtalen endte med at banken rådet meg om å bytte statsborgerskap. Banken mente dette var veien å gå for å utstede visakort med ID.

Og her er jeg da. Helt norsk på alle mulige områder, men allikevel må jeg bevise og krangle meg til det som er en selvfølgelighet for alle andre.

Jeg har fortsatt ikke bankkort med ID, men hva jeg har fått er en ny forståelse av hvordan de som vandrer inn til Norge med mål for øye om en ny start i en ny tilværelse opplever Norge og nordmenn.

Du skal neimen ikke komme hit og tro at du er noe.

HOLIDAY HANGOVER365

Posted by vagablond 2012-07-30 15:26:27

Physically I am back in the office. I am here, that must be sufficient evidence. Mentally I am still on a plastic mattress in the pool in Spain. The sun licks my body, the crickets sing, the wind smells like Hawaii flowers and being well aware of the rosé cava set for cooling for the sundowner later on, life is paused. I have no deadlines and my ego is slowly re-booting. My fingers dance on the water surface. Plick plock. Holiday. Sigh..

The spreadsheets and numbers in front of me now drift away far into the screen. Just like the sand taken by waves off the beach, silently disappearing far away into the horizon.

However, far far away in the horizon the wave comes back on shore to me and all of a sudden my vision of a horizon is brutally interrupted by a grey room-divider which separates my desk from the one of a colleague. Pinpointed calendars, currency rate sheets, company slogans and to-do lists stare at me with an “Hola? Hello? Will you return to this planet soon?” Well. Not completely there yet. Just a coffee, then “just” checking some holiday pictures on the phone, then “just” checking the weather in Spain.. and compare it with the forecast for Norway. Immediate sadness. Then “just” this and “just” that, and then its lunch. The phone rings.

Ok. Back to reality. Re-booting on hold. I hear you mister To-do-list!

Physically I am back in the office. And reality has deadlines.

Once the focus takes over, reality isn´t that bad. It is the contrast to what makes the holiday even more fantastic. And fantastic is what I like – so I will hold on to this holiday hangover for as long as I can.

ICED VALENTINE365

Posted by vagablond 2012-02-16 15:48:46

I smell freshly brewed coffee and as I open my eyes the smell is confirmed reality and not just a dream as I see him standing on the doorstep of the bedroom with two cups in his hands. Good morning - coffee in bed, enjoyed to the wonderful view of snowcapped mountains in remote Norway.

A small breakfast and then jumping into a thermo suit; scarf, gloves, hat, goggles, gaiters.. and more of the fresh coffee on a thermo can. -3 degrees and partly clouded. The clouds move fast, so it might become windier during the day.

Off we go across the frozen lake, through the birch forest, crossing a river and we head up up up.. On the hillsides, cruising into the day on a snowmobile. Heading for the two peaks Hallingknatten and Korpenatten before returning to the heated cottage.

Snowmobilesafari turns out to become a reindeersafari. A reindeer herd of 70 or so animals trott along the hillside, moving as if they where a scarf blowing in the wind. Synchronized, just like a brown-grey wave, floating along the highlands. Impressive. I spot a grouse, camouflaged in white feathers in the snow. As it takes off to avoid being digested by our vehicle, it becomes windier. The sky turns grey. It seems like the sun has set, as the sky turns darker. A magic contrast between the dark, fast moving clouds and the clean, white, frozen ground and shapes of an iced landscape.

The wind takes up more and takes along small ice and snow flakes from the ground, throwing them around and up in the air. Faster. More. Harder. Colder. Free facial peeling treatment as we speed up on the snowmobile deciding to head back to the cottage.

As we turn, the contrasts in the landscape dissapear as everything now is white. The ground, the wind, the sky. Rough. Beautiful. Nature.

We spend the evening indoors as the wind continues to increase in strength. A bottle of wine. Another bottle of wine. Fire in the oven. Valentines day.

...

Good morning. Waking up to the view of snowcapped mountains. The aggressive winds of the night has transformed the smooth snow of yesterday into frozen waves and aggressive looking ice sculptures. "We are trapped".
The roads are blocked. We decide to stay a day longer in the mountains. Valentines day extended.


Vagablond - out&about





Flachau CHECK365

Posted by vagablond 2012-02-12 13:48:48

And the skiing trip to Austria is now officially over (apart from the fact that I still feel it in my buttocks when taking the stairs).

Everything was great on the flight down and we arrived eager and excited for the upcoming week. The pension I had booked, named Schrempfgut, was so-so and located a bit outside town. Bad however were the beds, hard as rocks. And the bed was to become were I spent the first 36 hours of the trip. Stomach flu, fever and back ache. Grrrrrrrreat.

I recovered somewhat quickly and forced myself to ski as I after all was on a SKIING trip. No time to lose. The first two days on skis I barely remember. We saw nothing, as there was no sunshine. And we spent most of the time in huts and cabins drinking hot chocolate and gluehwein as the outdoor temperature at times reached -25.

Halfway in the stay we decided to do a daytrip to Bad Gastein. Thats about 47km of skiing from Flachau (excluding bus rides, including lift rides) Although we still had no sunshine, we had a rise in temperature. At -15 skiing was all of a sudden comfortable. And with my new invested black face mask, which made me look like a ninja, I could ski without having to bother about frost bites in my face.
I felt how the healthy version of myself returned to my body after days of absence.. and I was beginning to enjoy the skiing and seeing the potential increase for the next couple of days: Snow fall was forecasted and this means powder!

Then my boyfriend all of a sudden turned white and wrenched his stomach inside out.
In the restaurant. In a ski hut. Behind a bus stop. And in the hotel. Over and over.
So much for a recovery.

Anyways, we somewhat managed to enjoy a couple of parties, we celebrated a birthday with a toboggan competition at night, we both became fed up with the 2012 après ski hit “mosa mosa, asi voce me mata”, we had some nice meals with traditional Austrian food (although I found it quite sad to pay for food I knew I wouldn´t digest) , we danced to wannabe-stars in a barn, we went downhill with a camera on the helmet, we pumped powder for 2 days and had a pleasant time together with sweaty, naked, fat, old men in a hotel sauna.

Conclusion: travel to the Alps when the sun is out, when temperature is human, when you have exercised sufficient in advance for your legs to put up with half a meter of powder and when feeling well :)

Fair to mention is that we on our departure day both felt well, the sun was out and we had 2 hours of skiing with the mountains to ourselves as we were first ones up with the gondola in the morning.

First tracks - unbeatable.


Vagablond - out and about


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Sunshine CHECK365

Posted by vagablond 2012-01-31 21:46:46

smiley

FLACHAU weather forecast the next week

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Sunscreen and cold cream packed!

Pack list365

Posted by vagablond 2012-01-31 21:37:03

Packing packing..

I am a terrible packer. A last-minute packer, an undesicive packer, an either "overweight packer bringing much more than I could ever use" or a "way to little-packer arriving with less than what I need".

So, what to bring this time?

I love making to-do lists. But pack-lists? No. Never made one. Doesn´t work for me.
How I pack?
I open all the drawers and doors of my wardrobe, randomly select clothing and hope that whenever I will use it they´ll combine and look good.

Tomorrow I am travelling with 4 luggage items. Light weight? Niet.

1 regular bag, 1 ski-bag, 1 bag the ski-boots and a backpack.
(If you are sherpa and read this, flight is at 11:00 and some assistance would be great.)

Travelling to Flachau, Austria. Long time, no see, no ski.

I used to work as a travel guide on skis there seasons 03/04 and 05/06. Heading back will be great;)
Skiing, skiing, skiing, eating schnitzels, apres-skiing in Hofstadl, jaegermaisters and lots lots of other things/drinks.

Ok, I have postponed the packing long enough now. Wish you all a great first week of February. For sure I will have one!

pow-pow-pow

And thanks for the champagne today!


Vagablond - out&about

Bye bye bad Monday365

Posted by vagablond 2012-01-23 20:55:26

Bad bad Monday.

I woke up early (05:30) and happy ( ) .

Lots of snow and lots of motivation to get early to work and start the week being efficient. All things were fantastic! - till I got out of bed. I hit my toe on the bed, ouch. I lit the light - light bulb died. Well well.. bad start, happy ending, right?

Shower. No conditioner.. Pfff... Hairdryer causes electricity fall out.. Great. Bad hair day. Still early.

Cappuccino? No milk..

Shovelling snow (06:10-06:30). Arriving at the garage. Opening the garage. Opening the car door. Starting the car? Nope. Batteries flat. Great. (06:35)...(06:45)...(06:50)

I phone a friend who, to my luck, overslept - she can pick me up. (07:00)... (07:10) COLD (07:12) I hear a car! Not my friend. I stop the car anyway and get help with the flat batteries. I cancel the pickup service and drive quickly to work. Not all the way though. 5 km on the road and I remember I have changed my handbag. I didn't bring my work access badge. 07:35: U-turn. 07:45: Back to where I was, on the way to work. Almost no fuel - but sufficient not to bother fuelling. I have no more time to loose!

RUSH HOUR. (08:00)... (08:10)... (08:20)

Arriving the office: 08:40! Never been this late.

Too much work ³. Too short lunch.

16:30 At the dentist.

17:00: A new appointment at the dentist in two weeks. Wisdom tooth bye bye.

Heading home. 17:45 No fuel.

Fuel price has gone up with 3 NOK since the morning. Great. Overpriced. Grumpy...

Home. Shovelling snow. Tired.

Now: Monday bye bye.

Vagablond - out&about

TRAVEL ADAPTER & OTHER SOLUTIONSVOYAGER

Posted by vagablond 2012-01-22 12:29:36

There are many things one can forget when travelling.
Passport, credit cards, house keys (when travelling to 2nd homes) etc. And solutions are in those cases not always possible to come up with in short time.

A friend of mine just posted this picture on facebook (below) - and that made me think of all the strange episodes I have had, trying to fix something on the way (duck taping shoes, cutting chewing gum out of my hair as I had no opportunity to shower for days, supergluing my snowboardbindings, forcing my European hairdryer to fit the electrical outlet in South America, every day for 3 months!.. and the stories are many)

But nevertheless, the best episode was in Nepal, when I had worn my clothes for more than 2 weeks and my sherpa took my clothes to the laundry shop. (aka the icey river behind the rocky hut)
I was happy to have my clothes cleaned and went into the living of the sherpa house where we stayed that night.
Outdoors the temperature was well below 0 and indoors the oven in the middle of the room filled with dried yak shit made the family gather around. (The families actually sleep on benches in the room where they have the oven. A house usually has 2 rooms; a kitchen and a living/sleeping room. (it would be wrong to name it a bed room, as they have no beds..) The kitchen has an open fire and the living has an oven.

I sat down to have dinner and not long after I had ordered my noodle soup, I noticed it dripped on my head from above. As the construction quality was poor I thought I'd ignore the leak and didn't bother to say anything.

I was served my soup from the sherpa grandmother, she was doing the kitchen service that evening.. A minute later the sherpa housewife on the opposite side of the oven was bothered by the leak too. She touched her head, put on a grumpy face and stood up. She said something to me in Nepali and left the room.
All the men were giggling; grandpa sherpa, uncle sherpa, cousin sherpa, brother sherpa, sherpa baby and some of the neighbouring sherpas. They laughed and blushed and looked at me..

I then looked up, and to my surprise all my clothing was placed on beams and on a temporarily constructed drying rack above our heads.. My socks, my bra, my panties, my tights, my everything.. to the amusement of all the male sherpas.

I was so embarrased when I realised the sherpa housewife was not pleased by having this European girl there, who showed off all her underwear!

To my excuse; little did I know that my sherpa had also taken my "hidden" laundry bag as he went to the "laundry shop" earlier that day. I would obviously never had wanted him to clean my underwear!
Anyways, lesson learned; my clothes smelled like burned yak shit for the rest of my stay and I did not bother to wash it at all - as I now knew that Sherpa people only do laundry when the weather allows you to dry it outdoors. Indoor? tabu.


Creative travel adapter


Vagablond - out&about

Cross Country Queens365

Posted by vagablond 2012-01-19 19:40:28

It is hereby witnessed that the Norwegians, and Norwegians only, are born with skis on their feet! I am German, so please have me excused..

Day 2 with skis on my feet and they are nothing but unstable, slippery and insanely fast. ..so it feels. A kid aged approx 11 skated past me, downhill.. SKATED! At that moment I realised I wasn't that pro after all (we had skated and climbed hills, I was short of breath and took on my best downhill position as I approached the edge of the hill; knees bent, weight forward, stiff as a dead person and slower than a slug) Anyway, it is great sports and I have considered giving it up after two times. It is a killer!

Breathing ice cold air, falling on hard snow, 11-year old baby having better techniques and the work of taking off the wax after each session... bleh. And the sticks, not to forget about the sticks! They could indeed kill you, at least blind you within a nanosecond if you're not paying attention! Dangerous dangerous, and yet no warning stickers on the equipment. Giving up?

Hell no. I will be a pro, just wait and see! My motivation is on the absolute contrary level as my current technique, or art, name it whatever you want.

Together with friend Anki we will take over the hills of Konnerud and become the queens of the slopes! (She is Norwegian though, so there is no excuse for her)

I actually imagined really well the sound of cow bells and a cheering audience when we entered the last 50 metres towards the parking area. I was skating like a goddess. 10 metres behind me came Anki with a broken binding. Oh yes, we competed towards the finish line (the car park), and I crossed it first. I WON!

Anyways, at a 7km/hour speed, there is room for improvement and the upcoming weekend I will dedicate all my time on my new skis. (You were hereby informed; there is free entertainment skating around the Norwegian wood this weekend)

I wish you a nice one!

Vagablond -out&about

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Trainrides and travelling to heaven365

Posted by vagablond 2012-01-15 22:29:13

Somewhat travel-related, I found these two jokes the other day smiley hi hi hi

A tall dark stranger on the train


Through a scheduling mix up, a man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train.

It's late, the train is full, and everyone else is already asleep.
After the initial embarrassment, they both manage to get to sleep; the woman on the top bunk, the man on the lower.

In the middle of the night the woman leans over and says, "I'm sorry to bother you, but I'm awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly pass me another blanket."

The man leans out and, with a glint in his eye, says, "I've got a better idea ... let's pretend we're married."

"Why not," giggles the woman.

"Good," he replies. "Get your own blanket."


Travelling through heaven

Once there were three men, Dave, John, and Sam, who were involved in a tragic car accident in which all three died.
As they stood at the gates of heaven St. Peter came up to them and said, "You will all be given a method of transportation for your eternal use around heaven. You will be judged on your past deeds, and will have your transport chosen accordingly."

St. Peter looked at Dave and said, "You, Dave, were a bad man. You cheated on your wife four times! For this, you will drive around Heaven in an old beat up Dodge."

Next St. Peter looked at John and said, "You, were not so evil, but you still cheated on your wife two times. For this, you will forever travel around heaven in a Toyota stationwagon."

St. Peter finally looked at Sam, and said, "You, Sam, have set a fine example. You did not have sex until after marriage, and you never cheated on your wife! For this, you will forever travel through heaven in a Ferrari."

A short time later, Jon and Dave pulled up in their cars next to Sam's Ferrari and there he is, sitting on the hood, head in hands, crying. "What's wrong, Sam?" they asked. "You got the Ferrari! You are set forever! Why so down?"

Sam looked up, ever so slowly opened his mouth and cried, "I just saw my wife go by on a skate board."